Guys! Guys! According to Strava (yes I’m Strava’ing all of my walks….don’t judge….) I’ve walked/hiked almost 70 kms over 16 hours this month! I want to print that off and send it to my doctors and nurses to let them know that I’ve been taking their prescription of a minimum of thirty minutes of walking every day seriously.
[checks how to download Strava stats into excel….]
The first round of chemo has gone really well, no nausea thanks to some pretty amazing anti-emetics (anti-nausea drugs) and my energy level and appetite returned to normal a little over a week later. There was that one day where I felt like my body was too heavy and brain too foggy to get off the couch but did manage to drag myself out for 27 minutes of a slow shuffle around the neighbourhood. I swear if I didn’t already have socks in my shoes right by the front door I would have used that as an excuse not to go.
A close friend who is one of my “when the zombie apocalypse hits I want you beside me” tribe gave me a quote that I’ve been using as my daily mantra: whatever you can give today is just right. Man that is a tough one to accept for those of us who like to charge ahead every day.
Chemo fog is a very real thing and I was frustrated at how quickly it set it. Walking in the forest has been the best way to deal with the it, it’s the only time when I feel like my brain and my external environment are moving on the same wavelength. My symptoms feel very much like what I’ve heard described by people with concussions, inability to think of words quickly, forgetting tasks, easily overwhelmed with too much external stimulus so please be patient with me during these times.
During the worst of it I couldn’t even read so was relegated to watching mindless youtube videos and Netflix series. Pretty sure I know all the rescue series where the paramedics/doctors/lifeguards have an accent of some kind, but if you have a fave please feel free to send it my way.
On the flip side, for the past two days I’ve felt very much like normal-me so it’s been frustrating not to be able to do normal-me things like respond to SAR calls or go skiing. I’ve been feeling melancholy for the past two days that I’m not skiing, not patrolling, not responding to SAR calls (two call outs yesterday!) even though I feel like my normal self. Got out for a couple of hours of dog training (aka standing around talking about dogs) with two of my dog-nerd friends which was so good for my soul.
This morning I woke up to snow in Nanaimo, something that would normally make me over the moon happy but today it highlighted what I’m missing out on. A good hike in the snow up to Westwood Ridge and a chat with a teammate on how the calls went lifted my spirits but am acutely aware of how easy it is to slip into FOMOlandia.
Let’s hope chemo cycle #2 on Wednesday goes as well as this round has…..